2 Sam 16:5 As King David came to Bahurim, a man came out of the village cursing them. It was Shimei son of Gera, from the same clan as Saul’s family. 6 He threw stones at the king and the king’s officers and all the mighty warriors who surrounded him. 7 “Get out of here, you murderer, you scoundrel!” he shouted at David
In 2004, I had a horrific ‘church’ experience. I was completely at fault. I repented and asked for forgiveness and had received forgiveness from God and all those involved. It still smarts to this day. The amazing thing was all the people that really jumped onto the “bandwagon” to curse me, didn’t know the facts. Instead of circling their wagon train around me to help me out, to talk to me about it, they chose to believe what they had heard, and be angry.
The Gospel is about reconciliation. Jesus came to reconcile. But if you fail as you are trying to do something for the church body, the ‘brethren’ will eat you alive, whether you repent or not. God is a God of second chances. That is (according to some people) until you get saved and try to actually do something for the Lord and get tripped up in the process. It is easy to not fail if you stay on the couch and in the pew.
We are all products of Christ’s reconciliation and restoration. Even more so, the worst attackers are the people who don’t have a clue what did or didn’t happen. Shimei wasn’t attacking based on fact. He was attacking based on rumors of what ‘he said she said.’ He said, dishonestly, that God had cursed David. He figured that the bad things that were happening to his own family (selfish interests) were because David had sinned and God was punishing him. And now Shimei was embellishing his wrong ideas and misrepresenting God in the process. That’s precisely why I cringe when people say ‘God hath said’..
2 Samuel 16: 7 And thus said Shimei when he cursed, Come out, come out, thou bloody man, and thou man of Belial: 8 The Lord hath returned upon thee all the blood of the house of Saul, in whose stead thou hast reigned; and the Lord hath delivered the kingdom into the hand of Absalom thy son: and, behold, thou art taken in thy mischief, because thou art a bloody man.
David wasn’t perfect. He was a sinner. Just the same way that Shimei and I are sinners. Just like Moses, your pastor, and the Christian brother you respect most in the church are. We all continue to slip, sin, fall every day. Because David was a soldier, he killed more than 10,000 men. He was a crummy dad and even worse husband. He was an adulterer. He didn’t go to war with his men like he should have. He murdered his friend to cover his sin. He was prideful, He was a liar. He was cowardly, so much so, that he faked insanity, making a fool of himself. Yet, God told the seemingly perfect King Saul ….
1 Samuel 13:14 But thy kingdom shall not continue: the Lord hath sought him a man after his own heart, and the Lord hath commanded him to be captain over his people, because thou hast not kept that which the Lord commanded thee.
And the condition of David’s Godly heart was reconfirmed in the New Testament
Acts 13:22 says, “After removing Saul, he made David their king. He testified concerning him: ‘I have found David son of Jesse a man after my own heart; he will do everything I want him to do.'”
So Shimei was sinning. He was touching God’s anointed. I think he really believed that he was right and doing the will of God. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. In his religious zeal he was hateful, angry and spiteful. Non-forgiving worst of all. None of those words can be used in context with the Holy Spirit. I grew up in a large, mean, religious family. That scarred me for life. Church was always an unsafe place for me. When I finally got saved, I lightened up and relaxed a little. I trusted the church. 9 years later I slipped and got blown out of the water, with a vengeance. To this day, 20 years later, people are still mad at me, and don’t even know the story. Some people just love to be angry I guess. I personally love them all. (that’s why it hurts) I don’t have a bitter bone in my body. David didn’t either. David’s ‘devil dog’ warriors said, ‘Can we please bump off this holier than thou, loud mouthed cry-baby?’ David said no!
2 Samuel 16:12 It may be that the Lord will look on mine affliction, and that the Lord will requite me good for his cursing this day.
My horrible church experience and all the self appointed Shimeis unknowingly blessed the socks off of me. I am joyously aware that God used this experience to make me a better Pastor, missionary, Christian, husband, friend, confidant, mentor, grace-dispenser and father. God paid me back for all the false accusations and cursing that I took. I deserved some of them, but God made sure I came out better for taking it all in, even the exaggerations, refusing to retaliate. Not just me. Lots of people feel church is an unsafe place because of people who have the ‘spirit’ of Shimei.
Like David, me, and all the people who are seen as lepers in the modern church (outed ‘sinners’, defrocked pastors, poor, divorcees, mixed families, interracial couples, destitute, unemployed, deformed, mentally ill, socially awkward, alcoholics, aids-cancer warriors, people coming out of the gay lifestyle, barren women, ex sex addicts, prostitutes, singles, junkies, cons, or just the plain stinkers, dirty, poor hygiene uglies and fatsos, etc) want to hide in a cave. That might be good for a short time.
It’s good for a while to be alone in a cave, to practice the presence of God. It’s invigorating to fall in love with Him again. But if you stay in the cave too long, you just might ‘cave in’, like ‘doubting Thomas’ who ended up being a martyr, a hero in the faith, once he got back into fellowship, and out of his ‘cave’. Shimeis however will always call this HERO OF THE FAITH ‘doubting Thomas’. So unfair, but that’s what Shimeis do.. it is in their DNA.
From my own experience, I can tell you that it’s a 99.999 % chance that your old church will never be a safe place to go back to if you tripped up. There still will be that hissing Shimei slithering around to make sure you’ll never be happy there again. You do not need that, especially from someone who might not even be saved in the first place. My old church has a deacon, mean as a snake. Been ‘saved’ for 70 years. Just as snarly as ever.
If you fail, I recommend that you dust yourself off and go to another church. There’s a billion of churches out there that need and appreciate new serious congregants, who would welcome you with open arms, and who will love You back to Redemption. Online church isn’t enough. Get with other believers.
Combat the chance of being a Shimei ‘the curser’ by being a blesser instead. You do that for starters, by getting plugged in again to a Bible believing, spirit filled church. You already know that cursing doesn’t work
The starting point is to vow to never ever be a Shimei.
How to Overcome or Break Free from the Shimeis in Your Life
1. Realize the blessing of God.
No one can curse you apart from God’s permission (Num. 22:12, 38; 23: 8, 20, 23).
If you are a child of God, you are blessed, in spite of what others do to you.
The blessing of God is more powerful than any human or ‘generational’ curse.
Through the cross of Christ, God has made provision to set you free from every curse. No curse of words, or anything else, has to control your life any longer.
God protects and vindicates the righteous. Those who live godly lives do not have to worry about curses coming to rest upon them. In fact the Bible says the curse will come back on the curser.
2. Review the curse.
If it applies, make changes,
What is the source of the words? Would you take advice from that source? Probably not. Then why care what the source says or thinks.
As you review the words others have said to you in light of the Word of God, ask: “Is this true? Does it agree with what God says?” If it’s true, repent and change. And ask forgiveness. If not, carry on!
3. Reject any words that are not true.
Curses only have power over us if we believe them. If they’re not true, they are powerless (Prov. 26:2). When we believe them, we empower them.
Make a choice to reject words that are not true, or do not line up with God’s Word.
4. Renew your mind.
Children may not know the truth, but adults are responsible to learn the truth.
Saturate your heart and mind with the Truth of God’s Word (Phil. 4:8-9).
Replace lies with Truth.
5. Receive God’s blessing.
Even when you cannot “feel” God’s blessing, you can receive it by faith.
After you have received God’s blessing, you are free to bless others. (Jacob’s example–Gen. 48-49)
6. Release those who have cursed you. We release others through forgiveness.
Forgiving others frees us to live victoriously in God’s blessing.
7. Repent of any cursing you have done to others.
Christians’ words should only be a source of blessing (James 3:8-11; 4:11).
Speaking evil of believers is a characteristic of non-believers (1 Pet. 2:12; 3:16)
Be careful about the impact of your words as a parent or with your spouse.
Don’t be careless with words.
Refrain from jesting, teasing, criticisms or constant “evaluations” that leave their mark.
Don’t make snap judgments or jump to conclusions–be “slow to speak”(James 1:19).
Be careful how you speak to children in public.
Be careful how you speak about parents (Prov. 30:11; 20:20), in-laws, pastors, employers, teachers, Christian workers and church members, friends and neighbors, even your “enemies.”
8. Refuse to return cursing for cursing.
Only return blessing for cursing (Rom. 12:14, 17-21).
The biblical principle is, you will reap what you sow (Gal. 6:7).
If you bless others, you will be blessed. If you curse them, you will be cursed.
9. Resolve to speak blessing.
Speak blessings to others.
Be proactive. Look for opportunities to bless, validate, and encourage.
Speak blessings not only to others, but also about others
Give specific blessings–personal and appropriate (Gen. 48:1-3, 15-16; 49:28).
Envision what God can do in others.
Exercise faith on their behalf through a blessing that can transform their future (Heb. 11:20-21).
Don’t just think it. Say it–now! Don’t wait for the funeral
Although there are many everyday opportunities to bless, blessings are also appropriate on special occasions (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.)
Blessings are especially important for those under your leadership or authority. (Wives can encourage their husbands to see the value of blessing their children.)
Words of blessing cause growth, give hope, and bring healing.
Blessings turn hearts toward the “Blesser”–our loving, just, and faithful God.
Words are powerful, and death and life are in the power of the tongue.
When we curse, contend, cause strife, slander (derived from devil), demean, diminish, or belittle with our words, we speak lies–Satan’s language.
When we speak the truth of God’s Word into people’s lives, we bless them.
Make the wise choice to become a blesser instead of a curser like Shimei.